Wednesday, April 13, 2011

I'll Never Know Why - But I Do Know...

So many times we ask the question, "Why?"  Why did I end up here?  Why did I lose that job?  Why did my friend walk away?  Why did my boyfriend leave me?  Why did I fail that test?  Why did she die?  Why do I obsess over stupid things that really don't mater?  Why do I have this disability? The "why" questions can be endless.  And if we aren't careful, we can drive ourselves completely crazy with the limitlessness of the word "why". 

Today I sit contemplating my own "why" questions.  Why this?  Why that?  Why not?  Why? Why? Why? And I realize I'm sounding a bit like a baby.  Furthermore, I'm looking into the past - the past that I can do nothing about.  It is over and done with.  It cannot be changed.  It cannot be removed.  It is what it is. 

I've recently started dating someone that has made me think about this quite a bit.  He lives fully in the present.  And for a planner like myself, it has rocked my boat.  It has made me feel completely uncomfortable.  It has, more than once, made me want to walk away.  But something keeps drawing me closer to this crazy way of thinking (HA - don't tell him I said that).  There is something to this living in the present. 

Of course there is a balance, but the Lord reminds me of these verses:

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:34


12Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.  Philippians 3:12-14

We have today.  Each day I wake up - that one moment - is all I am promised.  I don't know if the rest of the day will be seen.  I don't know if that evening I will lay my head on my pillow.  But what I do know is that each moment is for God.  Each moment is for His glory.  And if I get so wrapped up in my past or my future, I will not be able to see what it is He has for me today. 

No comments: