Walking to the Alter

There are moments in life where decisions have to be made that are not always easy. And rarely are they easy to stand by - but they are a must.  The moment of decision does not come suddenly, but through many hours of thought and anguish.  You are well aware of the possible outcomes.  You are aware of the costs.  And you are completely aware of the pain that could follow.  But at the end of the day - a decision must be made and you must trust that God is in control. 

Abraham faced something like that.  God told him to do something he would never have imagined.  God told him to sacrifice his only son.  Can you imagine?  You were told by God that you would be the father of many nations, yet you have no child.  And God doesn't give you one right away.  He waits until you're old and then says - okay - now I'll give you a son.  So here you are - old - finally with this son you've dreamed about - and God tells you to go sacrifice him!  Are you KIDDING ME!?!  No, God was not kidding.  I'm sure Abraham wished he heard God wrong at that moment.  Just the thought makes my heart sink.  Yet, a decision had to be made.  Will I do what must be done?  Or will I follow my own plan?  Will I do what is best in God's eyes?  Or will I do what is best for me?  Don't act like you haven't contemplated the thought of what is best for you instead of what is God's best.  And so, I'm sure with heavy heart, our father Abraham followed God's lead.  He gathered his things, including his only son, and headed to the alter where he would make a sacrifice. 

What has God asked you to sacrifice?  Is there something He is asking you to lay on the alter before Him?  He has of me.  And I have walked to the alter and laid it down.  You see, we know the end of the story of Abraham.  We know that God provided another sacrifice.  However, sometimes we forget that Abraham had to actually put Isaac on that alter.  I sit here trying to imagine how Abraham must have felt.  Fear?  God, what will Sarah say about this?  Will she understand?  Hurt?  God, I don't know why you are asking me to do this.  Why did you give him to me in the first place?  Brokenness?  I know this man of God tried to be strong, but I can almost see his already swollen eyes and then the all too familiar tears start streaming down his face as he looks at his son.  And finally trust.  God I will trust you because you are my God.  You gave, but today, you take away.  Thank you for the moments you allowed me to have.  Then.  Then and only then did God bring another sacrifice on the scene. 

Here we are at decision time.  Will I trust God, or will I trust my emotions?  Oh I've felt all of those emotions.  Fear, hurt, brokenness.  I know them all too well.  I wish I could tell myself that God will show up just like He did for Abraham.  But that doesn't always happen.  The trust is - trusting that God's ways are higher than our ways.  His plans are higher than our plans.  God is still God, no matter the outcome.  Know that my friend. 

And so I, with shaky legs, fear of the unknown, hurting heart, and swollen eyes have come to God to sacrifice what is His.  Because at the end of the day - I am not my own.  I was bought with a price.  I am not here for my glory and my plans but to glorify Him. 

Ephesians 5:20 always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.